Prime logo Prime members: New to Audible?
Get 2 free audiobooks during trial.
Pick 1 audiobook a month from our unmatched collection.
Listen all you want to thousands of included audiobooks, Originals, and podcasts.
Access exclusive sales and deals.
Premium Plus auto-renews for $14.95/mo after 30 days. Cancel anytime.
You Have to F--king Eat  By  cover art

You Have to F--king Eat

By: Adam Mansbach
Narrated by: Bryan Cranston
Try for $0.00

$14.95/month after 30 days. Cancel anytime.

Buy for $1.95

Buy for $1.95

Pay using card ending in
By confirming your purchase, you agree to Audible's Conditions of Use and Amazon's Privacy Notice. Taxes where applicable.

Publisher's summary

Emmy Award-winning actor Bryan Cranston (Breaking Bad, Malcom in the Middle) follows in the exasperated footsteps of Samuel L. Jackson, giving voice to the long-suffering father whose indifferent child will just not eat in this hilarious follow-up to Adam Mansbach's international best seller, Go the F--k to Sleep.

Mansbach's long-awaited sequel is about that other great parental frustration: getting your little angel to eat something that even vaguely resembles a normal meal. Profane, loving, and deeply cathartic, You Have to F--king Eat breaks the code of child-rearing silence, giving moms and dads (new, old, grand-, and expectant) a much-needed chance to laugh about a universal problem.

Anchored by a hilarious performance from Cranston, You Have to F--king Eat is the perfect blend of talented voice actor and subversive fun that expertly captures Mansbach’s trademark humor. Due to its explicit language, you probably shouldn't play this one for your kids.

©2014 Adam Mansbach (P)2014 Audible Inc.

What listeners say about You Have to F--king Eat

Average customer ratings
Overall
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    3,085
  • 4 Stars
    779
  • 3 Stars
    383
  • 2 Stars
    118
  • 1 Stars
    158
Performance
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    3,267
  • 4 Stars
    500
  • 3 Stars
    197
  • 2 Stars
    62
  • 1 Stars
    95
Story
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    2,638
  • 4 Stars
    702
  • 3 Stars
    449
  • 2 Stars
    141
  • 1 Stars
    166

Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.

Sort by:
Filter by:
  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Another role that Bryan Cranston plays to a T.

If you could sum up Free: You Have to F--king Eat in three words, what would they be?

Fucking EAT kid

Who was your favorite character and why?

My favorite character was the child, because they caused the main conflict in the book and advanced the plot nicely.

Which scene was your favorite?

The last scene, it threw a real curveball.

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

Of course, but I had to clear a few things from my schedule to fit it in.

Any additional comments?

The credits are quite long.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

18 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    2 out of 5 stars

Not with a bang, but a F--king Whimper

Adam Mansbach first book, "Go the F--K To Sleep' was brilliant because it was shocking, funny, original, and the meter worked. This one has Bryan Cranston, but that is just about it. IT wasn't nearly as good and the novelty is gone. It just doesn't work. Unless you are a die-hard eater, or love the F--k out of Adam Mansbach, I wouldn't buy this. But since it is free, sure down load the F--ker.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

17 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

You Have to F*cking Listen!

A year before I became the 'Ardent Audible Listener' from Monrovia, Audible Studios posted a free version of Samuel L. Jackson's narration of Adam Mansbach's "Go the F*ck to Sleep" (2011) on YouTube. I watched and listened over and over, and wished "Go the F*ck" had been published 10 years earlier when my youngest stayed up as long as she could, every night, so she didn't miss anything. It was a 4 minute story I'll never forget, and a Facebook topic among my friends for almost 10 days. And, as we all know, 10 days on FB is like a century in real life.

When I prepared to write this review, I discovered that Thandie Newton narrates a 'veddy, veddy uppercrust British version'; and George Lopez does a hysterical rendition En Español. It's probably even funnier to someone who actually speaks Spanish and exceeds my skill of ordering food at a Mexican restaurant that doesn't serve its food in a paper bag; navigating rural California by talking to people because Waze isn't getting a signal; and cursing at loud neighbors playing Ranchero music at 1 in the morning. Actually, anyone who can do the latter is going to love Lopez' vets.

The print book "Go the F*ck to Sleep" is beautifully illustrated. Its pictures echo the soothing, muted tones of Mira Ginsburg's 1982 "The Sun's Asleep Behind the Hill", illustrated by Paul O. Zelinsky (1953 - present). Ricardo Cortés illustrations in "Go the F*ck" are almost an homage to Zelinsky. Samuel L. Jackson was the perfect, soothing, dryly witty American narrator for that book.

The title, "You've Got to F*cking Eat" (2014) really does speak for itself. Owen Bozeman illustrates "F*cking Eat", with livelier colors and scenes that call to a kid that's up and moving, not one just out of the tubby, wearing Pjs with feet, and laying in bed.

There's a good reason I'm talking about print illustrations in an Audible review: Audible Studios posted several Audio versions on YouTube, complete with illustrations from the print books.

Both of Mansbach's "F*ck" books are equally risable, but the meter in "F*cking Eat" is off. Bryan Cranston really doesn't work well as a narrator for this story. He doesn't have the droll sense of humor Jackson has cultivated, and Jackson's introduction to "Go the F*ck" alone is a finely crafted piece of parent humor. Cranston's narration of "F*cking Eat" comes across as overwrought and his reading of the essential profanity conveys anger. I feel Mansbach was going for overwhelmed and exasperated. British actor Stephen Fry's "F*cking Eat" narration hits the right tone with me, and it's laugh out loud funny. Unfortunately, It's either not on Audible yet, or US users don't see UK versions.

I'm looking forward to more Mansbach "children's books for adults." I'd really like to see a "Get the F*ck Out of Bed" addressing a tween/teen, narrated by Cranston. Or if it's really dark, David Morrissey, who's best known to Americans as 'The Governor' on producer Frank Darrabont's "The Walking Dead". That's the guy to get my eldest the f*ck out of bed and on his way high school.

[If this review helped, please press YES. Thanks!]

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

15 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

More plot than twilight

Would you consider the audio edition of Free: You Have to F--king Eat to be better than the print version?

I love the narration but I'd rather read along with pictures.

What was one of the most memorable moments of Free: You Have to F--king Eat?

Everything from the first swear word to the last.

What about Bryan Cranston’s performance did you like?

Everything. His voice brings me to tears.

Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

When the child finally ate a pancake.

Any additional comments?

Highly recommend this to anyone with children who won't eat.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

11 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Hilarious!

If you could sum up Free: You Have to F--king Eat in three words, what would they be?

Seriously f--king hilarious!

What about Bryan Cranston’s performance did you like?

The Breaking Bad references (pancakes & scotch, neat)! I heard the original "Go the F--k to Sleep" about a year ago and loved it, but being a huge fan of Cranston, I like this one even better.

Who was the most memorable character of Free: You Have to F--king Eat and why?

Brian F--king Cranston, of course.

Any additional comments?

This was awesome. Thank you for making my day, audible!

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

5 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

It's funny cause it's true!

Would you listen to Free: You Have to F--king Eat again? Why?

I'll listen to this several times. It's so frustratingly accurate that you have to laugh.

Who was your favorite character and why?

Bryan Cranston as the aggravated parent is spot on.

Have you listened to any of Bryan Cranston’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

I have not listened to any other audio performances by Bryan Cranston, but I absolutely will now.

If you could take any character from Free: You Have to F--king Eat out to dinner, who would it be and why?

Bryan Cranston, of course, to see what he'd say when I don't fucking eat!

Any additional comments?

I enjoyed this so much!

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

5 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Amazingly Accurate!

What made the experience of listening to Free: You Have to F--king Eat the most enjoyable?

I think having experienced the same emotions as the father in the story it just made things more hilarious.

Have you listened to any of Bryan Cranston’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

Bryan Cranston is a great talent. Not only can he do comedy well, but drama perfectly also. His range is phenomenal and he was a great choice for this title.

Any additional comments?

I had downloaded Go the F**K to Sleep when it was offered previously and enjoyed it. I think it's a great opportunity for Audible to get new members by offering free access to books.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

5 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
  • K
  • 11-14-14

Another classic!

A classic in the same vein as "Go the F--- to Sleep." Oh, how I love these audiobooks! As I listened to "You have to F---ing Eat," I couldn't help but picture Bryan Cranston as Heidelberg trying to get a small child to eat. That, in itself, made me chuckle... a great listen!

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

3 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

I"M THE ONE WHO READS!!

Would you consider the audio edition of Free: You Have to F--king Eat to be better than the print version?

Audible stories are the future. Printed version of books are slowly going the way of the dinosaurs in my sad humble opinion.

Who was your favorite character and why?

BRYAN CRANSTON. He's a patron saint!

What about Bryan Cranston’s performance did you like?

Just him in his entirety. HE IS THE ONE WHO SPEAKS TELLING YOU TO GO FRICKIN EAT!!!

Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

It made me give me a slight chuckle.

Any additional comments?

Have him narrate the triquel!. (3rd entry in the series)

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

3 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

Eat

I just wished that Samuel L. Jackson would had told me to eat. He sure told me to sleep.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

3 people found this helpful