Message from the President
Greetings friend, and welcome to the May edition of the Comfort Connection!
Spring brings with it a season of newness! New projects, gardening, spring cleaning!
Some of us like to get into the corners and clean out the dust bunnies, and downsize items we don’t need any more.
But what about if you or someone you love is a "collector." When does collecting cross the line and become hoarding? How does hoarding affect relationships? When does hoarding become hazardous?
What is your role as a caregiver in the face of someone you care about who has hoarding behaviour?
First of all, it is important to understand a little about hoarding behaviour. Hoarding behaviour can get worse with age. Increasing anxiety, the fear of (more) loss, loneliness, and depression may tend towards increasing clutter. Dementia and confusion can make it impossible to discriminate between what is valuable and what is garbage, so it all gets saved in the hopes of keeping up that social façade. Hoarding may give them a sense of control.
What can a caregiver do? It is critical to be respectful, positive, and never use harsh tones. Sometimes it is best to say nothing except, “May I move this so I can sit down?”
If you want to help at all, it is necessary to build trust. That may take months! It took one of our caregivers working with an elderly woman who was a hoarder three weeks to change her out of her velour track suit. After several months she finally had permission to change the client’s sheets. Mounds of books had to be moved first. When she went to take the sheets off this centenarian's bed, they literally fell apart and crumbled in her hands.
What about if the condition of the home or apartment is unsafe? Sometimes the fire department has to become involved. At this point, the senior doesn’t have much say and the place needs to be cleared. If you are the one helping, it is even more important at this stage to remain respectful. Taking and moving these precious items can be like ripping out the owner’s heart.
As a final tip, one thing we learned is when you do get to sort a pile and have some items for the garbage, remember to take the garbage with you in your car – if you don’t, you may find it just where it was before you sorted it! Patience and a sense of humour will be your most valuable assets!
Blessings,
Katherine
Katherine Peters
President & CEO
