Elysian Charter School of Hoboken
Elysian Charter School of Hoboken
www.ecsnj.org friendsofelysian.org
Harry Laub, Ph.D., Director
Elysian Charter School
Weekly Newsletter

A Positively Different Public School

December 21, 2015         Vol. 11  Issue 15
Please note that the school newsletter is sent out on Mondays.  When there is a holiday, the newsletter is sent the following day.  Please send news to lynne.shapiro@ecsnj.org by 1:00 PM on Mondays.

The weekly newsletter is archived on Elysian's website, www.ecsnj.org, so that you can always access both the most recent newsletter as well as all previous ones.
Harry's Corner
Parents of Teenagers, Stuck Taking Out the Emotional Trash
From The New York Times, Motherlode Blog,  December 16, 2015
Psychologists have long observed that teenagers sometimes manage uncomfortable feelings by passing them off to their parents. Remember how your toddler wordlessly handed you her wrappers and empty juice boxes, and you reflexively accepted them, even when both of you stood right next to a wastebasket? In the adolescent equivalent, the trash is emotional, not actual, but the effect is the same: Our teenagers sometimes lighten their loads by passing their problems to us.
An adolescent seeking empathy isn’t the same as an adolescent trying to unload a feeling. It’s the difference between a teenager limply asking: “Do we have ice cream? I failed a test today and only Chunky Monkey will make life bearable” and a teenager glibly announcing, “Just F.Y.I., I failed a test today,” while making a beeline for Netflix. The former elicits compassion from parents. The latter produces dismay.
Transferring hard feelings to parents is not new to this generation (and, of course, not entirely limited to teenagers). I remember a lonely night in my first year of college when I phoned my mom, two time zones away, to complain of homesickness. She listened quietly, then offered many wise suggestions for how I could make things better. I instinctively rejected every one of them before abruptly ending the call on a melancholy note. My roommate materialized, and freshly unburdened, I joined her for a happy night out. When my mom called the next morning to check in, I was baffled by the exhaustion in her voice. She had been awake most of the night worrying about me.
Did I thank my mom for the gift of shouldering my sadness? No. I wasn’t consciously aware of having passed her a leaden emotional baton, any more than she was conscious of agreeing to accept it so that I could skip blithely away. Like most teenagers, I regarded my sadness from the night before in the same way we all regard the actual trash we throw away. Relieved of it. Done with it. When my mom called that next morning, I certainly had no interest in revisiting my unwanted feelings.
So what is the garbage-collecting, sleep-losing parent to do? Usually, nothing. Nothing, that is, beyond taking on, and taking out, the emotional trash. For many of the problems teenagers face, dumping the hard feeling is a remedy unto itself. Making my mom upset freed me to find a solution to my homesickness. In my work as a psychologist, I’ve known plenty of teenagers to bomb a test, fall apart about the grade at school, come home and unsettle their parents by acting cavalier about it, and then buckle down for the next exam.
Parents burdened by a teenager’s feelings deserve support from loving partners and friends. I know that my dad often took care of my mom while she took care of me. And with time and practice, adults can gain some perspective on these transactions and take comfort in watching how quickly most teenagers regain their footing as soon as they’ve shed their cumbersome distress.
Of course, almost anything that can be done can be overdone. The ease with which teenagers can now dispatch a disquieting text message has, without a doubt, contributed to the surge of helicopter parenting. I’m certain that I had “I-want-my-mom” pangs several times a day in high school and college. But acting on that impulse was usually inconvenient, if not impossible, so my friends and I managed with our nearby supports, solutions or distractions. Cellphones can easily become trash chutes. Accordingly, we need to be alert to how, and how quickly, we respond to troubling texts and calls, especially those coming from a teenager who hasn’t developed other strategies for managing daily dilemmas. “Bummer about the failed test. Got a game plan? Luv, Dad” is a perfectly reasonable response to a worrisome text from a teenager.
Both neuroscience and common sense tell us that the teenage years are often characterized by intense and erratic emotions. On the whole, teenagers have a variety of healthy tactics for managing life’s bumps (upsetting their parents being only one of them) but even the sturdiest of adolescents would sag under the weight of their feelings if they couldn’t toss some of them into handy and dependable receptacles. As we exchange presents this holiday season, let’s stop for a moment to honor the gift that so many parents give their teenagers all year round: the willingness to accept, and find a way to dispose of, the inevitable debris that comes with growing up.
Lisa Damour is a psychologist in private practice in Shaker Heights, Ohio, a clinical instructor at Case Western Reserve University and the director of Laurel School’s Center for Research on Girls. Her forthcoming book, Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood, will be available in February 2016. Follow her on Twitter: @LDamour.
Week in Rap Winner!
The 8th Grade has won the Week in Rap Shout Out Contest, thanks to the efforts of Henry Plotka. The Week in Rap is a video that the 8th graders watch every week that summarizes that week's major news events in a rap song. For this contest (it is different each week) Henry had to take one of the topics from last week's video and write 4-6 additional lines expanding upon the initial rap's information. Henry took on the topic of women in combat and the most recent decision that women are now allowed to take on combat roles in the military. His lyrics were: 

   " And now news that affects US troops

    For all the ladies strapping on those combat boots

    The big announcement was spoken

    For women now all combat roles are now open

    Secretary Carter said, "They'll be no exceptions."

    But others are still unsure of their perception

    Women will be fighting alongside the men

    Carrying pounds up to 110

    Army Rangers, Green Berets and Navy Seals

    These forces can now have women in the field

    Driving tanks, firing mortars and leading soldiers

    Women, in combat, can show that they're BOLDER."

We will be featured in a short "Shout Out" video at the beginning of the January 8th Week in Rap video. To win this contest has been a dream of Regan's that the 8th graders this year were determined to make come true. Thanks, Henry!
More Good News
Raul Hernandez, former Elysian student won first place in his division of the World Latin Dance Cup Competition.  His little brother Eduardo, also an Elysian student, is now appearing on Broadway in the show, “On Your Feet.”
Dismissal Notification
Parents must notify teachers of any changes in their child's dismissal by either calling the office or sending in a note - please do not sent an email.   
Reminder: Sibling Applications Are Due
If you have a child at Elysian already, and you are planning to enroll a sibling in the 2016-17 school year, please complete an application form and return it to Susan Gilbertson in the office.  You can find the form on Elysian's website or stop by the office to pick it up.  We must have an application on file before the January 13th Lottery in order for you to receive sibling preference.
Animal Shelter

5th graders have been working on persuasive writing for the past month.  As part of their work, they penned convincing letters to their parents, debated both sides of controversial statements, wrote public service announcements and created persuasive posters on a variety of topics.  To help bring this study to life, fifth graders have decided to assist a worthy cause during the holiday season.  

Fifth graders will be collecting supplies to donate to a local charity, the Liberty Humane Society (LHS) in Jersey City for its annual Holiday Fund Drive. We are collecting pet supplies (goods can be dropped off in John’s class) and also asking people to shop the Humane Society’s Amazon wish list where they can purchase items and have them sent directly to the shelter.  Fifth graders have also been promoting the idea of pet adoptions through advertisements and public service announcements.  They are really excited to ask for your help in making the holidays special for the dogs and cats at the shelter. For a complete list of items needed, a link to their Amazon wish list and a place to make donations, please visit Liberty Humane's website at www.libertyhumane.org/shelter_wishlist.

John & Cristina
5th Grade Teachers

Elysian Charter School has a long standing tradition of helping families in need. During this holiday season the ECS staff requests that you consider making a donation towards the purchase of gift cards to help families who could use a helping hand to purchase gifts for their children.

If you know of a family in need, or are  one yourself this year, please call me (201 876-0102), email diane.sasso@ecsnj.org or leave a note in my mailbox in the main office.  All referrals can be anonymous and  are confidential.

Please give your contribution to your child’s classroom teacher by 3:00 PM Friday, December 18th.

Thank you in advance for your generosity . It is very much appreciated.

Diane F. Sasso, LCSW
Changes to January Basketball Practice Schedule

Monday's practice schedule has changed slightly for the month of January (and possibly for the rest of the basketball season).  The practice schedule for the rest of December stays the same. Starting in January the 5th grade will practice from 3:00 -4:00 PM and the 6th grade will practice from 4:00 - 5:00 PM. Practices for all of the other grades have stayed the same. I sent home the official game schedules last week with your child. Thank you and have a happy and healthy new year.

December Practice Schedule

Mondays in December:
  • 5th Grade: 4:00-5:00 PM (there will be coverage for the 5th grade from 3:00 - 4 by a staff member)
  • 6th grade: 5:00 -6:00 PM
Tuesdays in December: 

  • 3rd grade: 3:00 -4:00 PM
  • 4th grade: 4:00 -5:00 PM (there will be coverage for the 4th grade from 3:00 - 4:00 by a staff member)
Wednesdays in December 

  • Please note that because Wednesday, December 16 it is a half day of school for staff development, the 6,7, & 8th grade girls team practice will be from 1:00 -2:00 PM and the 7 & 8 grade boys team practice from 2;00 -3:00 PM. 
  • Wednesday, December 23 is a half day of school for Winter Break so practice is canceled. 
PTSO Corner
FREE MONEY FOR ELYSIAN!! It is too easy! For all of you shopping for the holidays, please remember to sign up for Target, AmazonSmile and iGive as an easy way to help earn money for your school while you shop.  It only takes a few moments to sign up!  And if shopping at TinyPrints, use TPPHX3Z437 for 40% off through 12/31/15.  Please email elysianptso@gmail.com for a 40% code for use on Shutterfly products.  Just be sure to go through our storefront!  Please refer to No Brainer Moneymaker section of this newsletter for all the details and links.  Happy shopping!
No Brainer Moneymakers
Easy Ways To Raise Money for Our School At No Extra Cost To You. 
Shop through our storefront for Shutterfly and sign up for Amazon Smile, iGive and Target and just shop as usual!! It just takes two minutes!!  Pass along to your friends and family too!
  •  Shutterfly, TinyPrints and more -  Go to http://elysiancharter.shutterflystorefront.com.  Shop as usual.  No need to sign up, just use this link.  

  • Amazon Smile - http://smile.amazon.com/  Click on ‘change your charity’.  Select Elysian Charter.  Bookmark this address.   Shop as usual. 

  •  iGive -Go to www.iGive.com/ElysianCharter .  Fill out name, Password and email.  Click ‘Register Now’ button, install iGive button.  Shop!  You might have to click on a pop-up screen to verify at certain online stores.

  •  Target -  Go to www.target.com , click on REDcard and then ‘Learn about REDcard’.  Page down to ‘Take Charge of Education’ and click on ‘Learn More’.  Enter information under ‘Sign me up’ and click ‘Enroll’.  
Hoboken Homeless Shelter Paper Drive
Daniel Henson and Henry Plotka from the eighth grade are conducting a paper goods drive for the local homeless shelter. We are asking for paper goods such as paper cups, towels, plates, bowls, plastic forks, knives and spoons. In the downstairs lobby/entrance of the school, there is a box with a sign that says “middle school food drive". The shelter is in need of these items so we encourage you all to donate. Thanks!
Elysian Collects Box Tops and LABELS for Education:  Look for the container near Deb's desk in the office!  Thank you!
December Calendar
Monday, December 21
  • 7:00 PM Board of Trustees Meeting
  • See above for Basketball practice today.
Tuesday, December 22
  • 5th grade trip
  • 8th grade trip
  • See above for Basketball practice today.
  • Arts to Grow After School Theater Program, 3:00 - 4:30 (for Middle School students who are registered)
Wednesday, December 23
  • Half Day of School for Winter Break.  Afterschool Program is available until 4:00 PM
  • NO Basketball practice today.
Thursday, December 24 - Friday, January 1 
  • Winter Break
January 2016 Calendar
Monday, January 4
  • Return to school 
KUUMBA Day: Saturday, January 9 - mark your calendars - 12:30 - 4:00 PM. A complete KUUMBA schedule will be in the next newsletter! A Y...... is Saturday, January 9!

1460 Garden Street, Hoboken, NJ 07030
Harry Laub, Ph.D., Director | harry.laub@ecsnj.org | Phone:201.876.0102 | Fax:201.876.9576
powered by emma
Subscribe to our email list.