I must confess that when I was invited to write about suffering in my Advent reflection, I complained a bit: “I can write a Lenten reflection on this—but Advent?” My colleagues gently explained that certainly Mary and Joseph experienced profound suffering as they headed to Bethlehem. I was reminded, too, that the holiday season can be a time of stress and sadness for many people. One type of insidious suffering is the struggle to calmly breathe in the graces of this season.
How many times in our Advent busyness have we said, “I need to catch my breath. I need to pause and just breathe.” I think of Mary walking uphill with haste to Elizabeth’s. Did she need to stop and catch her breath? Similarly, on the road to Bethlehem, did she and Joseph stop in silence, taking deep breaths, in anticipation of their final destination and the blessed moment they would see the face of the Son of God?
I imagine St. Elizabeth Ann Seton stopping to consciously breathe at critical points in her life as well. She, too, knew how to move with haste in love, always “prepared to meet God’s graces.” During her Advent journeys, filled with ministerial good works, she likely needed to slow down and catch her breath. How difficult it must have been for her to “try to make [her] very breathing an act of continual thanksgiving” when she had to gasp for breath at times, particularly at the end of her life as she battled tuberculosis.
A few days ago, a dear friend who has struggled for many years with COPD was hospitalized after her lungs collapsed. This has been a terrifying and painful ordeal, as she fights valiantly to breathe. Conscious of each breath, Carol also is conscious of God’s presence. She has kept her faith, simultaneously praying for healing and in gratitude for the good life that God has given her. She is an inspiration.
What is the Advent lesson for me? It seems to me that the great men and women of faith who have stopped to catch their breath have had the grace of catching the breath of God. St. Elizabeth Ann Seton, for example, seemed to live what St. Hildegard of Bingen wrote in the 12th century: “I am a feather on the breath of God.” Imagine if we were to continue our Advent journey, guided by the breath of God to a Christmas encounter with the Divine Child Jesus who opens his arms to take our feathers, our very lives, into his heart.
Let us be “feathers on the breath of God” leading us to the manger. Let us catch the Divine breath and be guided safely into His life and love. May we have the joy of breathing in the peace of Christ this Christmas and sharing it with those who grace our path.
