“When everything is said and done, more is said than done.” With friends like Job’s, he did not need enemies. A friend reminded me that the Jewish practice of “Shiva” or “seven” involved seven days of sitting silently, and waiting for the bereaved to speak. Once that person spoke, others were free to speak. Job 2 is sometimes cited as the origin of Shiva, though Job predated the Jewish cultural customs. His friends’ practice may have set that pattern.
Even when we are free to speak, we should steward our words carefully, lest we become “miserable comforters” like Eliphaz, Bildad and Zophar. Their comforting words were, “You got what you deserved,” and “It could have been worse.” Not only did they speak ill of Job but they spoke long. This did not help. Job corrects them by saying, “That is easy for you to say.” What would he have done if the tables were turned, and they had experienced loss? Job says he would have encouraged, comforted, and brought relief.
Though we never know what others are enduring, we may be sure that there is a bucket of tears under every heart. When Dr. Daniel Vestal acknowledged the pain in the room in his sermon last Sunday, he connected with all of us at some level. Given that reality, we must decide whether to rub salt or salve on the wounds of others. At our best, we are wounded healers. In Paul’s words, The “God of all comfort, comforts us in all our troubles so that we may comfort those in any trouble . . .” (2 Corinthians 1:3). This is easier to say than to do.
Monday was national encouragement day. I was encouraged to know there was such a day. Did we miss it? It is not too late for us. Even if we missed the day, we may find a way today to offer words that put courage in others. Ready. Go!
