MAY 2026 UPDATE

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MEN APPLYING GRADUATE LEVEL CHRIST-LIKENESS

Their Commitment is Showing

 

We have a number of pastors who’ve enrolled in our Christ Quest Institute Fellow Warriors online program. One of the things that’s so uplifting to me is hearing them say, “In my life, I’ve never heard these biblical truths before.”

 

Here are a couple of examples:

 

“My journey began when an evangelist friend recommended that I read Discovering the Mind of a Woman. What a discovery! The themes and material were raw… and I found my flesh taking a beating at every page. Since then, I’ve had regular discipleship calls with Ken. God has used him to help me discover so much.

 

“First, I discovered the greatest issue of all - Self! It has been painful to have my flesh, selfishness, and pride exposed.

 

“Secondly, I discovered the biblical role for a wife. Thinking of her as my greatest ally or help meet has been transformational and difficult to change.

 

“Thirdly, I have discovered the importance of understanding my spirit. I’m still far from where I need to be. Yet, I pray that I can become spiritually mature so that I can lead my family, my church, and hopefully other men… be true Spiritual leaders!

 

“Lastly, I have discovered the amazing nature of the Christ! As I struggle to emulate Him… it makes me thankful for my great Savior.”

 

Pastor Navarete 

 

Confusion, disbelief, aloneness.

 

“I couldn’t wrap my mind around the handwritten piece of paper in my hands. 

‘Don’t look for us; we will talk about custody of the kids.’

 

“I was doing everything right, and yet the present reality spoke of a different paradigm. 

 

“My family sneaking out of the house was the wake-up call I needed to uncover my sin nature.

 

“My sin nature didn’t like to be exposed. Yet through Ken Nair’s support and CQI’s Fellow Warriors classes, I saw my flesh for what it was. I saw my anger problem. My wife could not be the helper God intended, as I was not a safe person for her to confide in when I wronged her. 

 

“God had to wake me up. It’s been several years since that note. I’ve noticed that my kids want to spend more time with me. In fact, they are hustling now to do activities with Daddy. They are spending less time on technology. They are getting into fewer squabbles. What has changed? Me. I am gradually becoming more like Christ. Thank you, Ken, for your discipleship.”

 

Pastor Gerasci

 

“While finishing my time alone with our God this morning, it was clear to me that the Lord had directed us to move to St. Augustine. He wanted me to get a greater understanding of His plan for my life and the girl of my dreams that He brought into my life forty years earlier in 1979. It was a few years later that I read Football Coach McCartney's interview where He mentioned his encounter with you and your book. So, I foolishly bought your book, Understanding the Mind of a Woman, and God began to expose the deep depravity and faulty misunderstanding of what it meant to ‘look out for the interests of my wife and not just my own’, which I thought was so Godly. I am not sure if I sent this to you before, but if I did, it still rings true of the faithfulness of God to us broken and feeble creatures, on whom He has set His affections and care. Just a side note. When I first opened your book, I read a few pages and threw it across the room and then stomped on it. But the Lord stayed after me. I picked it up again and read a few more pages and threw it down again, in tears, anger, dismay and conviction. He is such a kind and loving Father and knows just how to move us where He wants us to be at just the right time. 

 

“Thanks Ken, all your wounds are not in vain. God just keeps on messing in our messes, and He gets all the glory. We must decrease and then He will increase.” 

 

David 

MY SPIRITUAL UMBRELLA/CUP RUNNETH OVER

Ongoing Projects That Keep Me Busy

 

Something pointed and heavy fell in the sink in my bathroom. It punched a tiny, barely perceptible hole in it that went all the way through, causing it to need to be replaced. (The crack came while removing it.) 

 

Since I had to wait a week to get the replacement and wanting to be ready to put it back together quicker, I removed all the plumbing the week before. Now came the difficulty. As an undermounted sink and because of the v-e-r-y excessive silicone caulk they used to glue it to the “marble” countertop, it took me two hours to start cutting it with a Stanley knife. Then I had to use a putty knife and hammer to jamb through the compound while placing tiny wedges as I progressed to help it release. 

Then, after four more hours of work, here it is completed.

But, before I started to finish this, to keep me out of mischief, I went out to finish picking the 300 oranges still on the tree at 6:00 am. There are nearly 2 to 3,000 oranges on that 60+ year-old tree.

 

Since I have diabetes, it won’t allow me to eat oranges. So, I give seven of our neighbors, our daughter, and several members of our Thursday night classes multiple bags of 80 oranges.

After picking the rest of the oranges and because it’s fully springtime here in Arizona, as it was only 91 degrees (yes, it’s moving towards summer), I had to trim the growth on the peach tree where the branches had grown through the wire-mesh cover.

 

It fills my cup to get things that need to be completed checked off my list!

TO QUENCH YOUR SPIRITUAL THIRST

Problems to Solve

 

This is one of the most important objectives I needed to personally focus on and achieve, because as a 3-year-old child I stopped interacting with anyone on a personal level. That I know of, I only communicated when it was essential to me.

 

Here’s what I’m talking about: God tells us in Proverbs 18:21 (AMP) “Death and life are in the power of the tongue.”

 

Death’s number in Strongs Exhaustive Concordance is 4194. There the Hebrew word for death is maveth, pronounced maw-veth. It means death (natural or violent) ruin (be) dead(ly) die.

 

Life’s number 2416 and Life is chay, pronounced khah-ee, but it’s a root work from 2421, chayah pronounced khaw-yaw. It’s a primitive root word meaning: to live, to revive, to keep (leave, make) alive, give (promise) life.

 

Power’s number is 3027 and power is yad, pronounced yawd. It’s also a word with primitive roots meaning “an open hand”. For clarification let me propose a visual. Imagine you’re in court being judged. You’re about to speak and the judge holds up his open hand with his palm towards you, thus ordering you to be silent. And you know you better be silent. Here’s some more descriptive words for yad: strength, swear, terror.

 

Tongue’s number is 3955 and tongue is lashown, pronounced law-shone. It means the tongue (of man or animal) (as the instrument of eating or speech) babbler, evil speaker, language, talker, tongue.

 

Notice the verbal focus of the word “tongue”. However, I think most men would believe that this verse is addressing physical circumstances and would not attribute to it the emotional, spiritual realm.

 

Many marriages start out looking forward to a future of fulfilled anticipation. A husband’s anticipation would be that he’s got his woman. A wife (whether she’s aware of it or not) anticipates that the man she married, her husband, will care for her inner-person (her heart/her spirit). They both anticipate that the other will care for their needs.

 

She will quickly sense his physical desires/demands and therefore will apply herself to meeting them. However, her husband, not even being aware of her God-given spiritual needs, will not be meeting them. Why? Because her husband has not been trained to thoroughly understand his own human spirit — much less her human spirit — therefore, even though he may be fulfilling those normal physical needs, he will not be able to function as his wife’s spirit’s caretaker.

 

Neither will he understanding how to care for her emotional needs like the Christ would/does.

However, learning how to understand and become the leader of his own human spirit will definitely allow him to understand a human spirit. Thus, as he learns to understand his own — he will then be enabled to be the spiritual leader of both of their spirits.

 

If that’s not the case, to the same degree, he is not a life-giving source of anticipation to her spirit — that is, she doesn’t see more and more Christ-likeness in him, making it to where neither of them will be fulfilling God’s role in the marriage. Thus, feeling unfulfilled, they will separate, either emotionally or physically.

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