Elysian Charter School
A Positively Different Public School
May 7, 2018 Vol. 13 Issue 32
The school newsletter is sent out on Mondays. When there is a holiday, the newsletter is sent the following day.
Originally published in the NY Times Op-Ed section on October 12, 2014
A Cure for Hyper-Parenting
By Pamela Druckerman
Credit Natalie Andrewson
PARIS — I recently spent the afternoon with some Norwegians who are making a documentary about French child-rearing. Why would people in one of the world’s most successful countries care how anyone else raises kids?
In Norway “we have brats, child kings, and many of us suffer from hyper-parenting. We’re spoiling them,” explained the producer, a father of three. The French “demand more of their kids, and this could be an inspiration to us.”
I used to think that only Americans and Brits did helicopter parenting. In fact, it’s now a global trend. Middle-class Brazilians, Chileans, Germans, Poles, Israelis, Russians and others have adopted versions of it too. The guilt-ridden, sacrificial mother — fretting that she’s overdoing it, or not doing enough — has become a global icon. In “Parenting With Style,” a working paper from the National Bureau of Economic Research, the economists Matthias Doepke and Fabrizio Zilibotti say intensive parenting springs from rising inequality, because parents know there’s a bigger payoff for people with lots of education and skills. (France is a rare rich country where helicoptering isn’t the norm.)
Hyper-parenting is also driven by science. The latest toddler brain studies reach parents in Bogotá and Berlin too. And people around the world are breeding later in life, when they’re richer and more grateful, so the whole parenting experience becomes hallowed. Scandinavians complain of “curling parents,” a reference to the sport in which you frantically scrub the ice to let a stone glide across it. (In Norway, “we do not, for example, count goals in soccer for children under 12, because they should all feel like winners,” the producer said.)
Twenty-first century parenting isn’t entirely illogical. Rather than trying to eradicate it, I suggest a strategy of containment: Rein in its excesses, and keep it from getting worse. Based on my own research, an unscientific reading of parenting literature, and a sample size of three kids, here are some key things modern parents should know:
Babies aren’t savages. Toddlers understand language long before they can talk. This means you can teach them not to pummel you with carrots at dinnertime, making your life calmer (and your floor cleaner). “Expect more from your children, and they will rise to it. Expect less, and they will sink,” Emma Jenner writes in the book “Keep Calm and Parent On.”
Seize windows of freedom joyfully, without guilt. Remember that the problem with hyper-parenting isn’t that it’s bad for children; it’s that it’s bad for parents. Between the mid-1990s and 2008, college-educated American moms began spending more than nine additional hours per week on child care; this came directly out of their leisure time. The greatest insight to emerge from France since “I think, therefore I am” is that children’s birthday parties should be drop-offs. The other parents get three hours to go off and play.
Don’t just parent for the future, parent for this evening. Your child probably won’t get into the Ivy League or win a sports scholarship. At age 24, he might be back in his childhood bedroom, in debt, after a mediocre college career. Raise him so that, if that happens, it will still have been worth it. A Dutch father of three told me about his Buddhist-inspired approach: total commitment to the process, total equanimity about the outcome.
Try the sleeping cure. Most parenting crises are caused by exhaustion. Force yourself to observe the same nighttime rituals as your toddler: bath, book, bed. When you feel an adult tantrum approaching, give yourself a timeout.
Have less stuff. Messiness compounds the chaos of family life.
Don’t worry about overscheduling your child. Kids who do extracurriculars have higher grades and self-esteem than those who don’t, among many other benefits, says a 2006 overview in the Society for Research in Child Development’s Social Policy Report. “Of greater concern,” it noted, “is the fact that many youth do not participate at all.”
Pamela Druckerman is an American journalist and the author of “Bringing Up Bébé: One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting.”
From Gail, Speech-Language Specialist
Dear Elysian Families,
You may be wondering what the posters "May is Better Speech and Hearing Month" in the hallways and staircases are all about! They are student-made messages to promote raise awareness about communication skills and "better" speech and hearing behaviors. Each May, the American Speech, Hearing, and Language Association (ASHA) provides an opportunity to raise awareness about communication disorders through its "May is Better Speech and Hearing Month" (BSHM) campaign.
For 2018, their theme is "Communication for All." You can check out the resources at their web site (www.asha.org) and contact me (or your child's teacher) about any concerns you may have regarding your child's speech, language, listening, and/or hearing development. This week's focus from ASHA is about hearing protection for all children, and especially those with hearing loss.
It is important for everyone to protect their hearing, but this is also (and especially!) true for children who already have some degree of hearing loss. Loud sounds or untreated ear infections can make hearing loss worse.
Here are some important tips:
Take your child to the doctor right away if you suspect an ear infection and have your pediatrician conduct a hearing screening. Go to a certified audiologist if hearing loss is detected.
Use earplugs or earmuffs when going to a fireworks display, concert, sporting events, or other noisy environment.
Keep the volume down when watching or using electronic devices.
Thanks for reading and again, please let me know if you have any concerns regarding your child's speech, language, listening, and or hearing development.
Gail Prusslin, M.S. M.Ed.
From The Nurse Regarding Energy Drinks
Recently a number of our students have been consuming energy drinks during the school day. These drinks are not intended for daily consumption and are not recommended for students ages seventeen or below. Energy drinks like Red Bull, Monster and Powder Packets, which are available online and in stores, contain excessive amounts of caffeine and sugar which research has shown to have a detrimental effect on children and teenagers. For example, a 500 ml can of Red Bull contains the same amount of caffeine as 2 cups of coffee and 13 teaspoons of sugar. In addition, these drinks are unregulated by the FDA and there has been no long term research into the effects they may have on the adolescent brain.
Consumption of these drinks can lead to poor concentration, lack of energy (when the inevitable crash occurs), poor behavior, insomnia, increased anxiety, headaches, increased blood pressure and heart rate. In extreme cases of consumption, energy drinks can lead to heart attacks and even death. Frequent reliance on this type of beverages can cause caffeine withdrawal when the user stops them. Withdrawal can lead to symptoms including, headache, fatigue, irritability and depression.
In line with the recommendation of the American Academy of Pediatrics and of the CDC and based upon a concern for the well-being of our student's, energy drinks and powders will not be allowed in school. I would also recommend that you follow the same guidelines at home.
Thank you in advance for your support and cooperation in this matter.
Diane DeSombre, RN
PARCC Test Schedule
Week 3 - May 7 thru May 11 - Grades 7 & 8
This Week's Enrichment Clubs
Debate Club III - 3:00 PM - 4:00 PM
"No Bake" Baking Club - 3:00 PM - 4:00 PM
Broadway Bound Club - 3:00 PM - 4:00 PM
Drawing Club - 3:00 PM - 4:00 PM
Create It and Make It Club - 3:00 PM - 4:00 PM
Calligraphy Club - 3:00 PM - 4:30 PM (1 1/2 Hour)
Anime Club - 3:00 PM - 4:30 PM (1 1/2 Hour)
Chess Club - 3:00 PM - 4:30 PM - (1 1/2 Hour) End date June 6 (14 week club)
Basic Baking Club - 3:00 PM - 4:00 PM
Clay Creations Club - 3:00 PM - 4:00 PM
Lego Club - 3:00 PM - 4:00 PM
Yoga Club - 3:00 PM - 4:00 PM
Dance with Derrick Club - 3:00 PM - 4:00 PM
Game Show Club - 3:00 PM - 4:00 PM
Hola Amigos! Club - 3:00 PM - 4:00 PM
Jewelry Making & Craft Club - 3:00 PM - 4:00 PM
Rock Climbing Club - 3:00 PM - 4:00 PM
We’re celebrating 20 years of Elysian!!!
It’s all happening this May…
- Purchase a copy of the Elysian20 Memory Book
A Journey to Home- a “yearbook” with pictures, memories, poetry, songs and more from the first day of Elysian to the 20th year.
You need a copy of this book!! $25 for hardcover or $15 for a softcover version.
ONLY available May 1-20 so get your copy at http://elysian20.picaboo.com/memorybook
- Come to Homecoming!
Sunday, May 20, 12:00 AM - 4:00 PM
Block party, food trucks, the premiere of The Elysian Movie, poetry readings, Honor Ceremony at 3pm and MORE!!
On Sunday, May 6th Elysian’s Elementary Rugby Club participated in an 8-team tournament at Chelsea Waterside Park in Manhattan. Ruggers from our 4th and 5th grades worked hard and showed great teamwork in walking away with a respectable 2-1-1 record on the day, earning 3rd place overall. The Club was represented by 5th graders Jacob Linder, Victor Mauseth, Anthony Defilippis and Henry Eig as well as 4th graders Jesse Pacheco-Berger, Jackson Filipps, Jeremy Laden, Ken Villatoro, Luke Schreiber, and Brady Touzalin. It was a great start to our season and we look forward to more great matches!
Coach John Rutledge
5th Grade Fundraiser
The 5th graders are still selling Elysian themed silicone bracelet wrist bands for $3 each.
These fun, colorful, Elysian themed bracelets can still be purchased by stopping by John’s classroom (Room 321) or by contacting John via e-mail at email@example.com
Please consider helping out the 5th graders raise money for their Mystic, CT overnight trip and at the same time showing off some Elysian pride!
Grilled Cheese Fundraiser
The 5th Grade is having their annual grilled cheese fundraiser on Thursday, May 10th and Friday, May 11th to raise money for our Mystic, CT trip. These tasty treats, prepared and grilled up by our very own 5th grade students, will be available for the low, low cost of $2 per sandwich. We’re selling these tasty treats at lunchtime and dismissal on BOTH days! Please help us out and buy some grilled cheese awesomeness!
Thanks, John & Erica
7th Grade Students and Parents
High School Info Session
Monday, May 21 - 6:00 PM - Hillary's room (Room 316)
Learn about the High School Application Process from the 8th Grade Teachers and the Guidance Counselor.
Square 1 Art DEADLINE EXTENDED! - Square 1 Art deadline for ordering ONLINE and by PHONE has been extended through midnight (EST) of May 9! This still includes free shipping to the school! Simply log on to www.square1art.com/shop and place your order using your child's specific code from the back of their catalog. Any questions, please email firstname.lastname@example.org.
Field Day is Coming Up! - Field Day will be held NEXT Wednesday, May 16! We are looking for volunteers to help out that morning. Please email email@example.com if you'd like to volunteer.
Elysian Picnic Help Wanted - We found a chair, but are still looking for some help with the planning and execution of the Annual Picnic! If you are interested, please email firstname.lastname@example.org.
PTSO Officers Wanted - We are looking for some interesting and interested parents to join the PTSO board for next year! If that sounds like you, please email email@example.com.
For the eighth year in a row, Elysian Charter School will be participating in the "Swing Fore the Schools Golf Outing.” This is Hudson County's largest golf outing benefiting multiple local schools serving more than 1,500 students. Last year our school earned over $7,000 by identifying sponsors and registering enthusiastic golfers.
This year's tournament will be held on Thursday, June 7, at the Crystal Springs Resort in Northwest New Jersey. Bus transportation to and from Hoboken will be available. Registration and the driving range open at 11 AM. Lunch begins at 12 Noon. Tee-off is at 1:30 PM.
Please consider being one of the 300 golfers who will play 36 holes, participate in fun contests, win prizes, and enjoy a delicious lunch and dinner while raising money for our schools! In order to take advantage of early bird special pricing, make sure to register before May 17!
And finally, please don’t miss out on the opportunity to promote your business through this well-attended event. There are several sponsorship packages (starting at $250) that provide for great visibility for companies interested in reaching families in Hudson County. Please contact Jeff Joss (firstname.lastname@example.org), chairperson for the tournament, for additional details.Design best-practices suggest a large font size for easy readability both on desktop and mobile devices.
SPRING FLING IS ALMOST HERE
Who: All 6th, 7th and 8th graders
When: May 18 from 6:30 pm - 9:30 pm
Where: Willie McBride's Back Room, 616 Grand Street, Hoboken
A permission slip is below. ALL PARENTS will need to sign the permission slip and return it to your child's teacher. Permission slips are due no later than Friday, May 18th at 11:00am. Cost is $10. Please hand the slip and the money to your homeroom teacher.
You will not be allowed entry into the dance if your name is not on the guest list!!
We are looking for at least 8 parents to chaperone.
Please get your permission slips in by Fri, May 11
SPRING FLING PERMISSION SLIP
The Middle School Spring Dance is being held Friday, May 18th from 6:30pm - 9:30pm at Willie McBrides, 616 Grand Street, Hoboken. If your child is attending please complete the Permission Slip below and return to your child’s Homeroom teacher. The cost is $10.00 per student.
**Please check here if in need of a scholarship. ________.
No one will be granted access without a permission slip.
Once you hand in your slip, (Please by Friday May 11) your name will be placed on the guest list. No money will be accepted at the dance. Once students enter the dance they will not be allowed to leave until pick up. No re-entry. Elysian students agree to abide to school rules on behavior.
Student _____________________ Grade_____ Teacher_____________________
My child will be picked up at 9:30pm by __________________________________
I give my child permission to attend the dance on May 18th, 2018.
Please pay by cash or check payable to ECS PTSO
Do you want input to the song selection at Spring Fling this year? Do you want to hear a certain song? No problem!
Write down your ideas and hand it in to Hillary!
Don't forget to hand in your permission slips by this Friday. We'd like to get an accurate count for the venue.
You don't want FOMO on this super fun night for all middle schoolers
MAY: BASKETBALL TOURNEY
There are still spots available for the family kickball and basketball events. These are wonderful opportunities to spend time with family and friends, gather with the Elysian community, and support the school all at once!
THURSDAY, MAY 24 • ONLY 5 SPOTS LEFT!
Join other Elysian Charter School families for a basketball shoot-out and charity basketball tournament on Thursday evening, May 24, at 6:30 PM. There will also be some special guest stars including current and former Elysian staff! Includes pizza and beverages, to keep that energy up!
JUNE: KICKBALL/DODGEBALL III (PARENTS VS. KIDS)
Grab the kids and join Elysian Charter School families for a night of games on Friday June 1, at 7:00 p.m. It’s parents vs. kids! Includes pizza and drinks, and a lot of laughs!
- Donated byJohn Rutledge (referee supreme!)
First Week Sold Out!!
Very Limited Spots Remaining in Week 2
Reminder: Elysian has a nut-free policy
Any lunches, snacks, classroom treats, etc. must be a nut-free product.
Please call Diane DeSombre, RN with any questions. Thank you.
News from the Office
If your child has an appointment during school hours, an adult must come to office to sign him/her out. No student may leave on their own. This is a Department of Education regulation.
Elysian Collects Box Tops and LABELS for Education
Look for the container near Deb's desk in the office! Thank you!
As per state law, we no longer publish the exact location of trips for security reasons.
Please read the calendar weekly, as changes are updated regularly.
Monday, May 7 - Friday, May 11
- 7th and 8th Grades PARCC tesiting
Tuesday, May 8
- Rugby practice, 3:00 PM - 3:45 PM, 1600 Park
Wednesday, May 9
Tuesday, May 15
- Rugby practice, 3:00 PM - 3:45 PM. 1600 Park
Wednesday, May 16
- Field Day
- 1/2 Day, 12:30 PM dismissal, Aftercare until 6:00 PM
Thursday, May 17
- Kindergarten Orientation, 8:45 AM
Friday, May 18
- Community Meeting. 8:45 AM - Gym
- Middle School Spring Fling, 6:30 PM - 9:30 PM, Willie McBrides
Sunday, May 20
- Elysian 20year Homecoming, 12:00 PM - 4:00 PM
Monday, May 21
- Dress Rehearsal for Mary Poppins
- High School Info Session for 7th Grade Students and Parents, 6:00 PM
- Board Meeting, 7:00 PM
Tuesday, May 22
- Performance of Mary Poppins
- Rugby practice, 3:00 PM - 3:45 PM, 1600 Park
Wednesday, May 23
- Performance of Mary Poppins
Thursday, May 24
- Auction Charity Basketball Game, 6:00 PM - 9:00 PM, Gym
Friday, May 25
- 1/2 Day, 12:30 PM dismissal
Monday, May 28
- Memorial Day, School Closed
Tuesday, May 29
- Rugby practice, 3:00 PM - 3:45 PM, 1600 Park
- 6th and 7th Grade Trip
Wednesday, May 30
- 5th and 8th Grade Science Exam
Friday. June 1
Wednesday, June 6
Thursday, June 7
Friday, June 8
- 3rd, 4th and 5th Grade Spring Concert - 9:00 AM - Gym
Saturday, June 9
- Rugby Cup - Grades 4 & 5, 8:30 AM - 3:00 PM, Randalls Island, NYC
- Rugby Cup - Grades 6 - 8, 8:30 AM - 3:00 PM, Randalls Island, NYC
Friday June 15
- Community Meeting, 8:45 AM - GYM
Thursday June 21
Friday, June 22
Monday June 25
- 1/2 Day 12:30 PM Dismissal
Tuesday, June 26
- 1/2 Day, 12:30 PM Dismissal
Wednesday, June 27
- 1/2 Day 12:30 PM Dismissal
- Last Day of School, Report Cards Distributed
- Because we have exceeded the number of built in snow days, we are required to extend the school year. The last day of school, as of now (i.e. if we have no more snow days), will be Wednesday, June 27th. The regulation is that we must have completed 180 school days prior to June 30th of the school year.
- June 25, 26 and 27 will have 12:30 dismissals
- 8th grade graduation has been moved to Thursday, June 21st.
Every year we build two or three days into the calendar to account for possible snow days. We also designate a number of days after the scheduled end of the school year as “snow day makeups.” This is designed to let everyone know, up front, of the possibilities.
A note about attendance: The New Jersey State Law is very specific about school attendance. By law, children are expected to be in school every day unless they are ill. There is no room in the law or regulations to excuse any children who have prior plans. We must mark all children absent who are not in attendance.
1460 Garden Street, Hoboken, NJ 07030
Harry Laub, Ph.D., Director