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Cec with David Waweru
Cec with David Waweru, his longtime friend from Kenya
Cec and mentoring clinic alumni
Cec and three alumni from his mentoring clinics: Jeff Adams, Yvonne Ortega, and Vie Herlocker
Selfish Love
Recently, it surprised me how often in the New Testament we’re commanded to love one another.  
James 2:8 says that such loving fulfills the royal law. I take that to mean the supreme law—one that supersedes all commands.
As a life principle, who could argue against it? The problem for most of us—or at least for me—is that I have to confess failure more often than success when it comes to obeying. My tendency is to say (or think), “Yes, I love Hank, but . . .”  
Three months ago, I was pondering Jesus’ double command to love God with our total being and others as ourselves (i.e., on the same level we love ourselves). See Matthew 22:37–39.
A thought hit me: I can’t truly love anyone else unless I first love Cec Murphey. Loving him means accepting him exactly as he is and not judging him. This isn’t to say ignore his shortcomings. If I love myself, I can show mercy and kindness to Cec, despite his mistakes and sins.
That led me to this: On the level that I love myself, I love those people in my life. If I can accept myself uncritically, I can pass on that compassion. My struggle has focused on unrestricted self-acceptance. That’s when I began daily my selfish-love prayer: Lord, help me love Cec uncritically so that I can love people nonjudgmentally.
I call it selfish because my goal is to blindly accept others as they are, but to do that I have to categorically love the man inside my skin.
My prayer encourages me to lavish grace on Cec so that he can extend it to everyone else. I call it selfish only because I’m learning self-compassion with a purpose. Perhaps many can accomplish that purpose easier than I can. I know that each morning my motivation to be more tolerant and kind to Cec has a further purpose to accept individuals without restriction.
I haven’t fully succeeded, but with this motive in mind, I’m slowly fulfilling Jesus’ words to love people on the same level as I love myself. 
Personal News 
  • I’m learning to erase the word productive from my personal vocabulary.

  • I continue to turn down opportunities for public speaking, especially writers conferences.
     
  • In 1998, Signs of the Times magazine published my article, “It’s a Joke.” They contacted me—nearly twenty years later—and asked to reprint it, with a nice payment. Of course, I said yes, feeling honored that anything I wrote that long ago would still be relevant. 
Cec at PENCON with his award Cec eating peanuts Yvonne waits patiently while Cec signs a book
Left: Christi Maguire, Yvonne Ortega, Cec, Kathy Ide, and Jenne Acevedo at PENCON. Cec keynoted the conference in Atlanta, and the Christian Editor Network presented him with a Lifetime Achievement Award for a lifetime of service and dedication to readers, writers, and editors. 
Center: Cec enjoys a break and a few peanuts at PENCON.
Right: Yvonne Ortega patiently awaits as Cec signs one of his many books.
The Twila Zone--News from My Assistant, Twila Belk
Have you heard that the longer you're with someone, the more you start to look alike? Can it be that after ten years with Cec this month I'm taking on his characteristics? Yikes! My new hair is coming in curly! It's a good thing I wear glasses; otherwise, you might not be able to tell us apart. 
I've been spending a lot of time writing lately. Unfortunately, I can't write as fast as Cec, and I'm fighting against chemo brain, but I've pushed hard, and I'll wrap up my manuscript for The Power to BE in a few days. I continue to contribute bi-monthly articles for Positive Note Magazine, and I've recently started to provide two devotions monthly for a Fox News commentator's website. 
I enjoy speaking and teaching, and it's especially fun to get return invitations. The director for the WordSowers Conference in Omaha asked me to return as faculty next April, and I received an invitation to be a workshop leader for this fall's Iron Sharpens Iron for Women Conference in Clinton, Iowa. I spoke there two years ago. 
I'll keynote for the Kentucky Christian Writers Conference June 22-24. Five years ago I was on faculty at the conference and the fabulous funny girl Chonda Pierce was the promoted keynoter. She cancelled just hours before the conference began because of a family emergency, and the director asked me to fill in for her three keynotes. Talk about scary! I'm honored that they wanted me back as their real keynoter this year.  
On July 11, I'll take a little break and have reconstruction surgery.
Cec's Links: Website, Twitter, Blog for writers, Blog for male survivors, Facebook (author/speaker), Facebook (Cec and Me), Murphey's Maxims Pinterest
Twila's Links: Website, Facebook (Twila Belk), Facebook (Gotta Tell Somebody Gal), Pinterest, Email, Raindrops from Heaven, Care Pages
Gotta Tell Somebody, Inc. | 5672 Appleton Road | Bettendorf, IA 52722



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