Padnos/Sarosik
Center for Civil Discourse

Better Conversations, Stronger Communities

September Newsletter
2026

Message from the Director

(This message was written with my son, Gregory.)

Dear Friends of the Center for Civil Discourse,

When my children were little, we used to go for puddle walks in the rain. As someone who has always loved the rain, this seemed like a great parenting choice! The kids would jump in the puddles as we walked, enjoying each splash. In between puddles, we were warmed by the summer rain..

One afternoon, my son ran ahead with excitement and jumped into a huge puddle. Down he went because this puddle was masking a sidewalk hole.

In that instant, he learned and I was reminded that what’s on the surface is not always what is underneath.

Now years later, my son and I recall this afternoon walk fondly and with appreciation for the reminder that there is always more to understand.

Puddle walks are a useful metaphor. Conversations offer opportunities to go beneath surface chit chat to a deeper level of understanding. Once someone is ready to jump into a conversation, they may discover a deep hole, as my son did, or a more shallow conversation puddle with a solid bottom. While some conversations feel riskier than others, each exchange, like each puddle, offers the promise of greater depth and deeper understanding than the surface indicates.

I have found that going out without an umbrella while it is raining to intentionally soak up the rain requires being open to one’s environment. Before exploring the depth of puddles, I need to intentionally walk into the rain. My first step is to be open to the experience.

Next time it rains, consider a puddle walk. It can be refreshing to allow the rain on one’s skin and exciting to discover what lies beneath the surface. And, if you decide to jump into a big puddle, as my son did, remember that even the deeper holes that cause us to lose our footing are manageable when we have support.

Wishing you peace and wellness,

Lisa

Faculty Fellow Dinner

Many gathered at the Faculty Fellow Dinner to celebrate Dan Cope as the 6th Padnos/Sarosik Civil Discourse Faculty Fellow. Friends, family, colleagues, and university leadership came together for an evening of fun and community.

Read Dan's Faculty Fellow Address

"Every time we choose to start an intentional dialogue instead of relying on emotional reaction, we demonstrate our commitment to civility and nonviolence."

~ Dan Cope, Padnos/Sarosik Civil Discourse Faculty Fellow

Ribbon Cutting in White Cloud

We were thrilled to join the community of White Cloud and the Fremont Area Community Foundation for a ribbon cutting of the White Cloud Community Library pavilion. Community members gathered for this pig roast celebration that also spotlighted a new musical sensory playground.

Greg Warsen, Center Advisory Council member, and Lisa Perhamus, director, were honored to attend this community event. As part of the Fremont Area Community Foundation's Goodwill Project, Greg and Lisa facilitated a series of community meetings where people considered the project that would most meaningfully meet the community's needs and reflect White Cloud's core values.

We thank the Fremont Area Community Foundation and the people of White Cloud for this invitation.

Meet Annette!

Tell us a little about yourself.

My name is Annette Gonzalez-Vazquez, and I am the Communication & Outreach Specialist for the Center. I'm currently a junior pursuing a Bachelor's degree in Business Management with a minor in Non-profit Administration within the Frederik Meijer Honors College. Last school year, I was the Development Intern for WGVU Public Media. This year, I was invited to be a Peter C. Cook Leadership Academy Mentee; it’s something I am really looking forward to. In the future, I hope to become a community event planner, hopefully in the educational field. Outside my studies and work, I enjoy spending time at Lake Michigan beaches, and I have recently taken up hiking.

Welcome New Advisory Council Members

Rick Treur has spent his professional life in public service, community engagement and entertainment. He currently serves as the Director of Talent & Leadership for the Grand Rapids Chamber where he oversees their professional development including Leadership Grand Rapids.

Conversation Corner

What questions do you have about challenging conversations?

QUESTION

What should I do when a relative says something controversial at the dinner table? I don't always want to let it slide, but I also don't want to ruin everyone's dinner.

RESPONSE

We hear that you sometimes want to address the comment and also want to respect everyone sharing a meal. One approach is to set a boundary for the dinner hour while also acknowledging what your relative said.

Try prioritizing connection without compromising your values.

If you want to set a clear boundary, acknowledge your relative's perspective while being mindful of the dinner vibe. You might say, "I know we see that differently, but I’d love for us to just enjoy our time together tonight; can we tackle the heavy topics another time?" If it's a topic you would like to explore further, you might offer to talk after dinner so you can listen and share without the added pressure of an audience.

Until the next question,

The Civil Discourse Team

Submit an Anonymous Question or Reflection

Check out our resources for bridge-building and engaging in conversations across difference. Have a resource to share? Let us know what we could add to the list!

RESOURCES

This Month's Highlight

"When Jess Janz found herself craving deeper conversations―but trapped in a world of small talk―she took a leap. What started as a casual idea in a hair salon soon became Dinner With Strangers: a growing movement where guests gather around a table, introduce themselves without ever mentioning work, and share who they are beyond the job title. No scripts, no expectations―just curiosity, courage, and a seat at the table.

In The Table Where We Meet, Jess reflects on what she's learned from hosting dinners with more than a thousand strangers across North America. With essays that are both tender and practical, she explores what it means to belong, how to ask better questions, and why connection requires us to risk being truly seen. Alongside her insights are unforgettable stories―funny, heartbreaking, deeply human―that reveal how much we all have in common when we finally let our guard down."