Remember the dark days of the Covid lockdown? Let’s take a trip down memory
lane with “lockdown lingo”.
Coronacoaster: The ups and downs of
your mood during the pandemic. You loved lockdown one minute but were
suddenly weepy with anxiety the next. It truly was “an emotional
coronacoaster”.
Quarantinis: Experimental cocktails mixed from whatever random
ingredients you had left in the house. The boozy equivalent of a store
cupboard supper. Southern Comfort and Ribena quarantini with a glacé cherry
garnish, anyone? These were sipped at “locktail hour”, i.e. “wine o’clock”
during lockdown, which seemed creep earlier with each passing week.
Coronials: As opposed to millennials, this referred to the future
generation of babies conceived during the coronavirus quarantine. They might
also become known as “Generation C” or, more spookily, “Children of the
Quarn”.
Furlough Merlot: Wine consumed to relieve the frustration of not
working. Also known as “bored-eaux” or “cabernet tedium”.
Coronadose: An overdose of bad news from consuming too much media
during a time of crisis. It could result in a “panicdemic”.
The elephant in the Zoom: The glaring issue during a
videoconferencing call that nobody felt able to mention. For example,
participant had dramatically put on weight, suddenly sprouted terrible
facial hair, or had a worryingly messy house visible in the background.
Quentin Quarantino: An attention-seeker using their time in
lockdown to make amateur films that they were convinced were funnier and
cleverer than they actually were.
Covidiot or Wuhan-ker: One who ignored public health advice or
behaved with reckless disregard for the safety of others was said to display
“covidiocy” or be “covidiotic”. Also called a “lockclown” or even a “Wuhan-ker”.
Goutbreak: The sudden fear that you had consumed so much wine,
cheese, home-made cake, and Easter chocolate in lockdown that your ankles
were swelling up like a medieval king’s.
Antisocial distancing: Using health precautions as an excuse for
snubbing neighbours and generally ignoring people you found irritating.
Coughin’ dodger: Someone so alarmed by an innocuous splutter or
throat-clear that they backed away in terror.
Mask-ara: Extra make-up applied to “make one’s eyes pop” before
venturing out in public wearing a face mask.
Covid-10: The 10 kilograms in weight that we gained from
comfort-eating and comfort-drinking. Also known as “fattening the curve”.