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Moonstone Monitor
| 24 April 2025
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IN THIS WEEK'S ISSUE |
Top stories |
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In the news |
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Learn with MBSE |
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Careers Platform |
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In Lighter Wyn
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ADVERTORIAL
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CAREERS PLATFORM - INDUSTRY POSITIONS |
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Short-Term Insurance Claims Negotiator: Intasure (PTY) Ltd, Cape Town, Southern Suburbs.
A well-established Insurance Brokerage in Cape Town, Southern Suburbs is looking to recruit a Claims Negotiator with the below requirements. |
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Financial Advisor: MillennialNxt, Umhlanga Ridge, KZN.
Join Our Client, a leading financial services group, and take the next step in your career as a Financial Advisor. We offer expert guidance, training, and a supportive environment to help you succeed in the financial industry. |
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Commercial Lines Underwriter: GVC Insurance Consultants , Pinelands, Cape Town,WC.
A well-established brokerage, based in Pinelands, is seeking a qualified Commercial Lines Underwriter to join their team. This is a permanent position within the Commercial Lines division, responsible for connecting clients with tailored coverage solutions. |
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Short-Term Insurance Commercial Lines Underwriter: Intasure (PTY) Ltd, Cape Town, Southern Suburbs.
A well-established Insurance Brokerage in Cape Town, Southern Suburbs requires the services of an office based Commercial Lines Underwriter. |
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Broker Support Administrator : Intellisure Insurance Brokers, Newlands, Cape Town.
An organised and competent Broker Support Administrator is required by a High Networth short term insurance brokerage based in Newlands, Cape Town. |
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IN LIGHTER WYN
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Dad jokes
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“What are your dogs’ names?”
Me: “Calvin and Klein.”
“Isn’t that a brand of underwear?”
Me: “Exactly, they’re boxers.”
I felt uncomfortable driving into the cemetery. The GPS blurted out, “You have reached your final destination.”
I have a fear of speed bumps. I am getting over it slowly.
Respect people who wear glasses. They paid money to see you.
What do you get when you cross a fish with an elephant? Swimming trunks.
I told a joke on a Zoom Meeting and no-one laughed. It turns out I’m not remotely funny.
When scientists said the universe is made up of protons, neutrons, and electrons, they forgot to mention morons.
What do you call an airplane full of bald people? Receding Airlines.
What do British sea monsters eat? Fish and ships.
My boss calls me “the computer”. Nothing to do with intelligence; I go to sleep if left unattended for 15 minutes.
I was going to cook alligator for dinner, but then I realised I only had a crock pot.
Three weeks ago, I sent my hearing aids in for repair. I’ve heard nothing since.
At my age, I am good at multitasking. I can listen, ignore, and forget all at once.
My son asked why I make noises every time I stand up. I told him it’s because I’m a groan man.
Why age gracefully when you can age like an old cheese? Full of character and slightly offensive.
I recently entered the world kleptomaniac championships. I took gold, silver, and bronze.
My wife asked me if I remembered what today is. I panicked and said, “Of course!” Now I just need to figure out what we’re celebrating.
I ran into a lamppost yesterday. Luckily, I only sustained light injuries.
My cellphone accidentally took a 10-minute video of my shoes yesterday. It was some pretty good footage.
I have written a book on how to fall down the stairs. It’s a step-by-step guide.
Me: “Doctor, will my pet snake be okay?”
Vet: “He’ll survive, but he’ll never walk again.”
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